(This article originally appeared at Canadian Soccer News on April 13, 2011. Wondering what this is? Click here.)
As David Beckham prepares to suit up against Toronto FC for the first time, news that the L.A. Galaxy star might return to Major League Soccer in 2012 came as a shock to some soccer fans.
Others, however, weren't quite as blown away.
"Yeah he's, like, a thousand years old, so I guess it's weird that he'd come back," said TFC fan Aiden Marsh, 10. "But of course he's gonna play in MLS. Where else would he play, the NHL?"
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Aiden, who says he became hooked on soccer after being taken to BMO Field for a game last summer, was unable to identify any of the clubs Beckham had represented prior to signing with L.A. in 2007.
"I heard he went to Italy for something last year, but I thought that was, like, a vacation. Or I dunno, some kind of party, like a bunga bunga or whatever."
Mentions of Manchester United, Real Madrid, the red card, the Greece free kick and the Spice Girls were met with glazed expressions.
"But he did kick all three balls into those three garbage cans on YouTube!" chimed in Aiden's friend Cody Johnson, 11. "That was pretty sick."
"Oh that was fake, you idiot," posited Aiden. "It's just an ad for Pepsi."
"Just 'cause it's an ad doesn't mean it's fake," retorted Cody. "I heard he practiced for, like, three days. Someone could probably do it."
"You're so stupid," concluded Aiden.
The two were asked why, since they're obviously technologically savvy, they'd never thought to google Beckham's name.
"Why would I bother?" asked Aiden. "He's not even that good."
"His wife is hot, though," said Cody.
"Yeah, you would say that," said Aiden. "Idiot."